Ryan McLean : Slightly Unconventional

Mental Breakdown – Day 18

Today was the weirdest day. But in order to explain today I must go back in the past.

About a month ago I found a great positive cashflow property that yielded an 11.2% return. Me and the missus tried to fund it ourselves but couldn’t, in Australia you have to have “proven savings” in order to get lending. Then a friend of mine showed interested in the property. We were pretty serious and even got to the point of going to get financing for the property.

Then the mortgage broker we went to go and see turned out to be not much of a mortgage broker. More of a “let me shove my personal financial advice down your throat” kind of person. So after being personally attacked by someone who doesn’t know me for 10 minutes and hearing him tell my friend that he would advise him not to invest with me I was kicked out of the room so the mortgage broker could talk to my friend without me. Then it turned out my friend didn’t want to invest in this deal after all…some night for me.

Note: I know the mortgage broker guy and when I was engaged he told me not to marry my wife, so I already disliked him.

I am used to people telling me why I can’t do what I know I am meant to do and why I should do what they tell me to do so this meeting wasn’t too bad for me. I can take the punches and keep going. For the next few days after the meeting I was shocked, and a little bummed that the investment deal wasn’t going ahead, but all in all I was alright.

Then today I just broke down. It was the weirdest experience. I just felt really angry and everything felt really hard. I had to help my missus return the items we hired for her baby shower. When the chairs scratched skin of my hands I felt as if someone had attacked me. The emotions were overwhelming. Then whilst carrying a trussle table one of the legs flew out and hit me in the head, leading me to eventual tears for no reason. It’s interesting having a day where you feel like you just can’t get happy no matter what. Turns out the male cure for this is …………hehe. Lucky I have a hot wife.

I think my emotions finally caught up with me today. The disappointment of putting so much work and emotional energy into something that didn’t eventuate was quite intense. It is not easy to almost achieve the near impossible but not achieve it. So my step towards wealth today was simply not giving up.

They don’t tell you how much of an emotional rollercoaster it is to try and build wealth. It’s freaking hard, no matter most people give up and settle for an office chain (I mean job) that provides a steady paycheck. Hey what can I say I work at a Chemist. I’m tied to a cash register instead of an office cubicle.

It’s pretty difficult relying on others to align with your dream and your plan. I am thinking now of focusing more energy online to raise capital so i can invest myself.

Note: To my friends who read this (especially the one who I almost JV’d with) I am ok, and not offened at you. This is simply me venting to the ether. I don’t need counselling or emotional support so don’t treat me like I do or ask me if I’m ok…it may lead to a punch in the face 🙂 just kidding…but seriously. I’m fine, just had a bad day.

Turns out that getting rich with a tiny income and no money isn’t easy…not that I ever thought it will be. But that will make my success all the more incredible.

2 responses to “Mental Breakdown – Day 18”

  1. casey says:

    “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
    Thomas Edison (inventor of the light bulb)

    If you set you will to learn from absolutely every minute of every day, and in this to partner with the One who brings wisdom and perspective to the lessons, you will not fail.

    “Never give in, never give in, never; never; never; never – in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense”
    Winston Churchill (another one of my hero’s)

    It’s the good sense bit that requires good judgement. He did back down more than once.

    “Proverbs 11:14 For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many …
    Where no advice is, the people fall; but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.”
    Solomon (another stubborn jackass with big dreams, a solid conviction, and an eye for a pretty girl (referring to your wife))

    You’re in good company.

    • ryan says:

      I am a little worried that with wisdom will come 500 wives. I think one is enough for me.

      It is interesting in the bible. When David is caught out for cheating by Nathan the prophet he repents and grieves and his baby dies. And after he repents and pays the consequences for his action wisdom is born (solomon is born)….coincidence?

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